I was at a wedding recently. The young couple had been together for 10 years, and their beautiful wedding day was a testament to their love. I was so happy to have been invited to share in their day, BUT…
During the ceremony and the speeches there was this theme of ADVENTURE – people were talking about the adventures they’d already had and the adventures that they’d embark on together now that they were married.
It got me thinking.
My husband and I have stopped having adventures – we used to have adventures. Just to name a few:
- We drove to Whitehorse in the winter – that’s right, the winter and Whitehorse does winter on a level the rest of us just can’t imagine. Unless you live in Yellowknife, Iqaluit or with the polar bears in Churchill, Manitoba, then maybe you do.
- We hiked to Cape Scott – twice.
- We hiked to Della Falls for our honeymoon. This involved a 5 hour canoe ride just to get to the base of the hike.
- We had twins – okay not technically an adventure but let me tell you having infant twins is a departure from reality.
Looking at our life today, we live a very safe and ordinary life – which is fine. It’s actually preferable to many of the alternatives, and I’m lucky – really lucky.
Where did the adventure go?
A quick analysis reveals that there are several factors that have curtailed our adventures:
- Having TWINS.
- My becoming ill – chronic pain makes multi-day hiking trips a bit dodgy to plan.
- Getting older – gasp!!
- Inertia – just can’t seem to get moving again. Also known as stuck in a rut.
But lately I’ve found myself watching shows where people trade their whole lives in to move to a tropical island and live off the grid. Now, to be honest, part of the reason I watch these shows is because they make the time pass when I’m curled up on a ball on the couch feeling miserable – too much pain to sleep and too much nausea to read. BUT the other part is because I’m getting itchy feet. I’m feeling like we’ve been stationary too long.
I think maybe we need an ADVENTURE – or at least I do.
And I know what the adventure should be:
Let’s quit our jobs, sell our house, and move to a tropical island to live off the grid on a beautiful white sand beach!
HOLD ON, THERE’S A PROBLEM…there’s always a problem.
I have this deep desire to get out of the city, go somewhere remote and hot and just live life on the beach. It would be so amazing!!
BUT, it turns out that there is a little problem with that dream – beyond asking my husband to quit his amazing job that he loves and uprooting my kids from their friends and school.
I’ve been dreaming of living on a tropical island – obsessed about it really – but this summer I had another one of my EPIPHANIES. My husband, the twins and I had gone to visit my dad in West Kelowna, British Columbia where it gets HOT. Maybe not as hot as the Sahara desert, but HOT all the same.
Unless I was sitting underneath the umbrella beside the pool with an ice cold drink in my hand, I was miserable.
I finally had to admit that I don’t really like the heat.
I mean, I LOVE the heat, if I can lie on a white sand beach, beside a tropical ocean, under an azure sky.
But, in real life, unless I’m staying at an all-inclusive resort, somebody at some point is going to get hungry and want me to make them dinner. And, I’m not sure, but I’m guessing, that even tropical bathrooms need to get cleaned now and then.
A dream dies…
I have to face facts: any attempt to execute my dream would result in epic failure unless I had amazing air conditioning, a maid, a cook, and a nanny.
So back to living on Vancouver Island where the weather is a little more temperate – and I do have excellent air conditioning on the rare occasions that I need it. The beaches aren’t white sand (unless you hike to the tip of the island – Cape Scott – and even then they are more off white), but they are ocean beaches and that’s good enough for me. Besides, if you don’t put your toe in the water, can you really tell we don’t live at the equator?
But, I’m still itching for an adventure – so what to do?
TIME TO SCALE BACK THE ADVENTURE
Time for a stay-venture. You’ve heard of a stay-cation, where you have a vacation without leaving your home – bring on the adventure from home!
So how do I capture some of my tropical island dream without uprooting everybody? How do I have the ocean adventure without the risk of catching some strange and unpronounceable tropical disease – or having to home school my kids (because I do NOT have the right personality for that).
TIME FOR DREAM MAPPING
Okay, I’m not really sure that dream mapping is a real thing – I might have made it up. I haven’t ‘googled’ to check yet. But, while I was trying to figure out how to live my dream without actually living my dream, I realized that I needed to analyze my dream for the KEY COMPONENTS. You know, ‘map my dream.’
What were the essential pieces of the dream?
I love the ocean. And guess what? I live by the ocean. So let’s get ON the ocean!
Sailing is the answer – I need to buy a sailboat.
I will admit that my husband humoured this new dream for a few weeks before he stomped on it. Okay, everybody I ever mentioned it to had the same reaction:
A sailboat will take ALL of your MONEY and TIME.
Apparently, sailboats require a lot of maintenance, and since I can’t just sail around in perpetuity, there would also be moorage fees. It all adds up to too much money. What I really need is a neighbor to buy a sailboat and need me to help sail it. But, until that happens, what to do?
Of note: my current neighbors bought a ski boat, so I don’t think that a sailboat is going to appear in the near future.
BACK TO DOWNSIZING THE DREAM
Once again, I found myself scaling back my dream to something that was manageable and within our budget – because who wants to be a slave to their dream?
What is the final draft of my dream map? I’m going to learn how to sail. Technically, I already have my first two levels, but it has been something like 20 years since I sailed a boat, so I’m going to start at the beginning.
I’ve already signed up for my first sailing excursion – 5 days of learn to sail along the coast of beautiful Vancouver Island – literally going where the wind takes us.
Stay tuned to hear more about my adventure chasing…
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